Studies have repeatedly shown that trans kids who receive support at home are less likely to experience depression, anxiety, or suicidality–being trans doesn’t cause mental illness, but being abandoned or rejected by your family and community does.

Support looks like taking intentional steps to use a person’s correct identifiers, helping to advocate in school and medicine, and offering kindness, celebration, and support through good days, bad days, and milestone moments. Parenting your trans child will still look very similar to parenting your cis child.

Especially if your child is older, helping to give them the “coming of age” experiences that are typically associated with other kids their age/gender can be a huge way of showing acceptance and normalizing their experience. This could mean planning a more gender-neutral b’nei mitzvah instead of a bar/bat mitzvah, taking your trans daughter to buy their first dress for a school dance, or teaching your trans son how to shave.

Resources:

Stand With Trans–Adjusting To New Pronouns

GLAAD–Tips for Allies of Transgender People

HRC–Supporting Your Young Gender Non-Conforming Child (English) (Spanish)

HRC–Supporting and Caring for Transgender Children

PFLAG–Supporting Your LGBTQ+ Grandchild (English) (Spanish)

National Center for Transgender Equality–Supporting the Transgender People in Your Life, A Guide to Being a Good Ally

Family Equality–How To Support Transgender Youth In Your Life

Gender Spectrum–Supportive Parenting

Gender Spectrum–Gender Affirmation Fact Sheet

Gender Spectrum–How Can Parents Support Their Gender Expansive Kids?

Gender Spectrum–Gender Development Fact Sheet

Mayo Clinic–Children and Gender Identity: Supporting Your Child

Next Avenue–How to Support a Transgender Child or Grandchild

Everyday Feminism–7 Ways Parents Can Be More Body Positive Toward Their Queer and Transgender Kids

Back to Parents of Trans Youth